A continuation of my last post.

Considering I’m a writer (and online for that matter) you must have had some thought as to my personality. I know a lot of people, but they all seem to have the same idea. I sound smart, so I must be. I get good grades, so it comes easily.and all those things box my personality. I’m placed in to one category, which I will stay in forever unless something drastic happens. That’s why people are always looking for a fresh start. They change schools or move to a different country because they know that the people here will always have that underlying idea of who they are. They know they can’t change that so if they meet new people they can give a new first impression. These are just small ideas. Sometimes it can be a mistake or something that happens to you which changes their impression, but not for the better. Sometimes it can harsher. Stereotypes are created based on how you look. Based on where your from. A very small characteristic which they use to define you. Sometimes these stereotypes are right, sometimes they’re wrong. But the idea is that it doesn’t decide anything. There are many factors needed to take into consideration and you can’t know this until you talk to someone.until then you don’t know why that person does well in school, or why they don’t have a lot of friends, or why they wear black all the time. You don’t know why they wear a scarf, or a cross, or have a tattoo on their neck.they are individuals and they are unique.

Hello, I know it has been a very long time but I decided to take a break as inspiration and time was very limited for me.
But I have something for you to think about. A man on e said that that of you do the same thing every single day nothing will ever change. And someone said that if you go too many days thinking this isn’t what I want to do, then you need to make a change. Now I went through that sort of phase. Where I wasn’t satisfied with where I was and I kept telling myself that it was where I had to be in order to get where I want to be.but life isn’t about being somewhere and attempting to reach your goal. It isn’t a run, where you only become something once you’ve finished. Life is a continuous journey. You attempt to do something, you do it. You fall down, you get back up. I went to school, came home, listened to teachers, listened to my parents, only letting go when I was alone. I want to be somewhere, but why is that place never where I am? I want to do something, but why is it never what I am actually doing? I’m sitting in my room writing this. I would look out of the window but the curtains are closed. I haven’t gone out for days. I spend most of my time in bed asking myself why I’m not doing nothing productive. Why I’m not doing anything at all…


It’s a new time for me.i feel like its a time where I’m gonna be different, where things will be time has gone by I have realised that I am wasting it and so much more could be done. I see all of these people doing something, trying to achieve their dreams and becoming who they want…

And then I look at me. What am I doing?

Nothing is the answer, nothing that will help me, nothing that I particularly want do, nothing at all.

It’s spring, its somewhat warm, the sun is out;its bright.i can feel the energy, know there’s something there for me to do, and today I have come to the realisation that if you have the option of doing nothing and doing something, doing something is not always the right choice. But when choosing between doing nothing and doing something that you love, something that will help someone… Then that is always the right choice. But in order for you to do what you love, you must work for it.
That is my conclusion,and for work to be done, one must be doing something;therefore not nothing, and so there is no excuse for wing lazy.

“To them this is just some place… But to us, this is our home”

something happened…

Something happened today. Something bad. I don’t quite understand it, or to what extent it will grow, but i know it will get worse. I know.

she found out, he found out, they found out, and suddenly the whole world knows whats going on. what is going on? are they okay , will she be okay. what did they talk about? will he shout, will he scream.


that’s the problem. things will always happen, just like today and I’ve considered what  i should do. I’ve taken precautions and listed the options but you can never prepare enough. Something always happens and then you walk around hoping for the best: but how can you hope for the best when you don’t know the worst. We’re all hidden from the truth somehow and no one else is going to tell us what it is: is going to spell it out. You have to find out for yourself.

So my preparation for next time is forget about what has happened and think about what your going to do. The past cant be changed and you don’t know the possibilities for the future until you take some action.

Do something.

The sky stays blue, the world keeps spinning, and the oceans are as wide and full as they have always been.

sometimes there is nothing to say, and you are left watching. In awe…

Ok, so as I’ve got a couple more people reading my blog I thought I’d make It a bit more on the Positive friend (I won’t say her name) isn’t going through the same things I am Because unlike me the guy she likes, likes her back. Apart from the fact that she isn’t really concentrating on her studies I’m absolutely happy for her because I’ve started to notice the little changes in her character Whenever she’s with him.she’s happier, she smiles more, she laughs at so many things she would usually say we’re crazy (she still thinks they’re crazy but she laughs…) I remember a time when she hardly ever laughed and I spent most of my time in school trying to put a smile on her face. Trying, just tryiNow this is why I’m happy, not just for her but for myself. I guess it’s a title selfish but I’ve got one of my closest friends back and that’s why this post is dedicated to her boyfriend. 

Although I didn’t like him to begin with he was able to do something I couldn’t do, something I needed to happen, and for that I am truly greatful.

as we all know, there are people in the world who we like and people who we don’t like, but what we need to be able to do is appreciate those who are just good. Those who have done something to help someone else, whether they know it or not. 

Lastly, don’t categorise someone because of past experiences. People are too varied to be simplified to such an extent and there is good in everyone… Even your enemies. 

I’m waiting for something to happen. Not sure what its gonna be but it’s gonna be big and its gonna make me forget about you and how you’ve hurt me. I’m moving forward, away from those blind dreams that never lead anywhere, but I still need that push. Something that can push me over the edge of pain and hostility and into the clouds of bliss and contentment. I need that something to happen and I know it will but the problem that has been worrying me is  how will I know when I’ve seen it? when its happened? Who I’ve passed?mand the riddle that I’ve been pondering is if its really what I think it is. when I see it, will it just be something ordinary.will it not make any difference at all.have I pushed myself into believing that it is the truth.or am I just sad enough to make myself believe my own lies.

i used to blame him for my pain. But no longer can I rest my hopes on his absence. I would be better off but the path I have chosen has meant that i have been living in my own history.

but I’m not gonna let this control my very being. I’m going to move on and I’m going to forget and if you don’t believe me.

watch me.